Monday, April 07, 2008

Marriage: For Happiness or Holiness?

1st Monday Every Month at Chrysalis
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It's time again for Marriage Monday, hosted by e-Mom at Chrysalis. Just click the picture above to visit her and find links to other participants.

We all want a happy marriage, right? No one goes into marriage thinking, "I hope we can just tolerate each other for the next fifty years." I was very fortunate to grow up with two parents who loved to be together. In fact, they still do. My dad won't even go to the store without my mom. They'll be celebrating their 43rd anniversary this year. So I have a wonderful role model of what marriage should look like. And I'm happy to have found someone who feels the same way about me.

So what did I learn about happiness from my parents?
- It's okay to disagree. I remember my parents arguing, certainly. But disagreements should never be deal-breakers. Usually their arguments turned into good-natured teasing, which is always fun to watch!
- Find something you can do together. My dad started a photography business, and my mom went to weddings with him, helped with his equipment, did videos when that new technology appeared, and then assembled the albums. They were a team.
- Share each others' interests. My mom has really gotten into genealogies lately. My dad is into computers. They've combined these two interests to the point where Mom actually got her own computer and is at least as good at using it as Dad is! It's not unusual to find them both sitting at their computers working away.
- Show a lot of affection. The more, the better. It's rare to be around my parents without seeing them touch in some way. They kiss a lot. I'm not going to speculate about anything beyond that, but I know they enjoy each other. ;)
- Share the responsibilities. Agree on who does what, but don't be rigid about it. Both of my parents understand their finances, both of them visit their doctors together. They share knowledge, they stay informed, and they stick together.
- Celebrate your relationship. My dad keeps track of every anniversary - the first date, the first kiss, and of course the wedding. Everything. I think that's incredibly sweet.
- Keep Christ at the center. My parents are strong Christian examples who pray together, worship together, and share their faith. And that's probably the most important example they could ever give me.

Thanks, Mom and Dad. You've given me a wonderful example on which to base my own marriage. I'm sure I just made you cry with this post, but tough! I love you!


  1. That is so cute that your Dad won't go to the store without your Mom.

    You have a great model for how a good marriage works, thank you for sharing what you've learned from them.


  2. Wow, what a beautiful example you have shared today.

    Great pointers too.

    Blessings to you and your wonderful parents!!

  3. how wonderful that you had such a great example to learn from!!!

  4. Oh Jana,

    What a beautiful post. I pray every woman reading this today will experience this kind of marriage. Blessings and I look forward to meeting your parents in heaven. Neat!

  5. Oh, you made me cry! I loved this post, and I'd love to meet your parents. I'm going to print this and enjoy it some more in the future. You're truly blessed to have a Mom and Dad who are happy together after so many years.

    Thanks for contributing to Marriage Monday. Your happy, good-natured attitude is a blessing to this group.

    Hugs, e-Mom :~D

  6. That is so sweet. WHat a great legacy and example left behind for you.